Monday, October 16, 2017

Library Bastards, Broken Homies, Supreme Overlord and an Ewok

Many years ago, two of us started our own club called Library Bastards - the rules being that you had to:

  1. Work in a library and,
  2. Be a bastard (as in, born out of wedlock).
We only ever had two members of our club (us), and up until recently I had forgotten all about the club (whose Facebook page died the death of the chronically neglected years ago). Now that the idea of Library Bastards has been (for the moment at least) revived, something a colleague said during our lunch break caught our ear: she's a bastard too!

It was quite gratifying to realise that we now have a third member of our Bastard club on board. We were discussing the club over lunch and I claimed to be the Supreme Overlord of Bastards since my parents were never married. Technically our newest member is in the same boat, since her father was never married to her mother, and instead her mother married her stepfather soon after she was born. So then I claimed to still be the Supreme Overlord of Bastards because my parents have never been married to anyone, ever, let alone each other.

I win, folks.

My original fellow Bastard was referred to as a stormtrooper to my Vader of Bastards, but she doesn't want to be a stormtrooper - she wants to be an ewok. I just thought that was unfair 'cause she gets to be too cute and fluffy, while I have to be DAAAARKNESS incarnate. But hey, I wanted the mantle of Supreme Overlord so I guess that's what you get.

The story isn't over, in case you wondered. Because what happened next was that a fourth colleague in a fit of envy requested to join our club. The problem, though, is that she's never actually been a bastard. She simply doesn't qualify. if you're going by those two rules up above. However, there is now a new club of which she is the head - the Broken Homies club - because she's from a broken home.

I tried to join her club since technically my home is/was broken too, but this new Supreme Overlord of Broken Homies brutally rebuffed my advance by claiming that her club is only for children of broken homes whose parents were married and then divorced. Hmph. I find that discriminatory, but oh well, we've created a monster now and it's loose in the world, rampaging.

So why am I discussing these clubs today? Well, I popped over here to find out if we had ever written about Library Bastards before, and it seems we hadn't. So I thought it was about time we did - particularly as we now have Broken Homies to talk about as well.

And will you look at that! We have two blog posts for 2017.

EDIT: S.O.B. = Supreme Overlord Bastard.

Wednesday, March 8, 2017

IELODSIWGWB - an acronym

While checking emails at work this morning, I stumbled across a most intriguing sight - the longest 'working group' name I ever remember seeing in all my history of checking out funny working group names and even funnier acronyms. This group's name actually had enough words in it to form an acronym longer than most words!

The group was calling on email readers to give a small bit of their time to make some comments on a particular topic of interest - however, my colleague worried that it might take all that requested time just to get through reading the group's name, leaving no time whatsoever for comments at the end!

P.S. Happy New Year.

Thursday, December 8, 2016

I swug this (new version of "I got this")

Hello again,

It isn't far off the end of 2016, and so we're getting in just in time with a post for the year. There isn't much of interest to say, except we always get a kick out of popping back to this blog and checking out the sheer madness of years past, captured in wacky blog posts for all the world to see.

We just hope there is no global disaster that ends up killing the interwebs, and therefore our wonderful blog of stupidity.

This time I have a new Facetious Fesaurus addition to report:

  • past tense of swig when you can't be bothered using extra letters to write "swigged" - "I swug that coffee."

And here is the last photo we took of the whiteboard prior to it being wiped (the most recent time):

Since this most recent wipeage, we have actually encountered the most extraordinary word in an unknown language in one of our metadata records, and our interpretation of its definition (to be added to the Fesaurus after this post is published):

    a tangerine on a tangent at Plantagenent .... O.O huh??

In closing, may we just say... "Happy New Year and Merry 'All That Stuff'!"

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

A list of 'whiteboard things' from May 2015

We agreed we should probably make a public record of 'stuff' that is on our whiteboard currently, because it's getting pretty chockers and that means it's going to be wiped clean sometime soon!

Ironically there isn't really anything work related, though I guess this one is a little bit related to some of the work we do:


Mostly though, it's things like:

-The absolute minimum of work that can be done
before it's seen as "not working"

"May the junk food fairy be with you"
- Trisha, 2014

The tedium of a tedious task is tediousness
.... tediously ....

a really small piece of a really big cake


There's more where that came from, but I
want a piece of mud cake with whipped
cream and a San Churro's hot chocolate
drizzled over it all. And I can't have one.
So here ends the blog post!

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

It's been a long time between rants

Hello everyone who isn't reading this!

I wanted to post something at least in 2014, so that this blog could have some TLC at least once a year. I have just added our latest word to the Facetious Fesaurus: "tawse". Go to the fesaurus to find out what this fascinating word means!

I have to admit to one of our favourite pastimes of late - looking up funny and ridiculous personalised numberplates on this site. I also keep a collection of personalised numberplates spotted out on the roads, which I update in a secure location where only friends can see. And I have a lot of people who help in that they report their own sightings of numberplates.

The latest report was of a number plate reading XTRAHOT.

Some of the worst ones are just too naughty to write in public, so I won't write them here. But they really do make a person wonder ... what are some people thinking?!

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Electronic calculating-machines

Source: tumblr
Today I want to draw attention to a very special (dusty and possibly moldy) old book we have in our collection, a book about electronic calculating-machines. Yep, that hyphen is meant to be there.

Electronic computers : fundamentals, systems, and applications / with the cooperation of Hans W. Gschwind, Martin G. Jaenke, and Robert G. Tantzen. Vienna : Springer ; Englewood Cliffs, N.J. : Prentice-Hall, 1961.

This book is apparently 235 pages long, has illustrations and diagrams, and has a spine length of 23 cm. It also includes bibliographies. Most importantly, though, it has a subject heading of "electronic calculating-machines". Totally avec hyphen.

I looked up this subject heading on Library of Congress Authorities and found that, unsurprisingly, it's been superseded by a brand spankin' new authority heading:

C o m p u t e r s

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

A new year...a new office space...and a new whiteboard!

It's that time again - the time when we clear off our wondrous whiteboard full of groovy things and start afresh. Fitting, really, since we're now in our new office space after spending endless weeks in what we called "library camp". The ants are gone, we have running water and we're seated within sight of a window... Yes, fresh air is the name of our game, and if it wasn't ridiculously stinkin' hot (I hate summer) we'd actually be enjoying some of it.

Anyway, the white board needs cleaning off, but some things will remain, for e.g. our time-map for each day:

  • 8am - 9am - Breakfast
  • 9am - 10am - Brorning Tea
  • 10am - 11am - Morning Tea
  • 11am - 12pm - Munch
  • 12pm - 2pm - Lunch
  • 2pm - 5pm - Postmunchitis

Possibly everything else will go, though we might actually keep the lists of items of work we're meant to be doing... I dunno.

Did I mention that Mo-faux Monday occurs every Monday?